This is the newest quilt they are working on at the Senior Citizens Center in Gainesville, MO. This lady hand embroidered all these deer on the quilt.
Everybody is now working on hand quilting it. They have all been hand quilting for years and have perfect tiny stitches. I did not go this week and will not be going back for a few weeks until they are finished with this quilt though. I'll be honest, she hurt my feelings. I asked her if my stitches were okay or if I should take them out and redo them. If she did not like them, all she had to say was to go ahead and redo them, after all I did ask her. Instead she said she did not know I would have to ask the lady in charge. Then she sat down and started stitching again and proceeded to lecture me on how she practiced her hand stitching for months at home before she tried working on someone else's quilt because she did not want stitches that were not very good on somebody else's quilt and that was not the place to practice, etc, etc. She made me feel an inch tall. Now please don't leave a lot of hateful comments about her in the comment section because I can understand that after all the time and money that she invested in this quilt she would want the stitches to look good, but she could have been nicer about it. The whole reason I was excited about finding a local quilting bee was 1. because I wanted the fellowship, there is no one around here for me to quilt or sew with and I really miss my sewing group in TX and 2. I wanted to learn from experienced women how to hand quilt. I have already learned a lot even though I've only been a few times (the holidays and weather got in the way). I have practiced a lot, but I was doing it wrong until one of the ladies took the time to show me the correct way. I don't have a problem with someone telling me nicely that I need to redo my stitches, that's how I learn.
I have told ya'll this as a reminder to be gracious to people who are learning and not to discourage them, although if you are reading my blog I'm sure you're not the kind of person to expect perfectionism because I try to keep it real and show you the bad along with the good. LOL
I really wish I could find people to quilt with. I'm hoping once I move to Ava I'll be able to find a group to quilt with, they actually have two quilt shops there!
I should add, that I will go back to the center after her quilt is finished to do more quilting because not every body feels that way.
Missy
Psalm 64:3 "Who whet their tongue like a sword, and bend their bows to shoot their arrows, even bitter words:"
16 comments:
The quilt is very pretty! That would have hurt my feelings too. My feelings are easily hurt. Hang in there. :)
Have a wonderful and Blessed day
Kristie33823665
I'm sorry, Missy. I've not participated in a quilting bee or group quilting before but it seems to me that if someone puts her quilt out there to be quilted by a group of ladies she should understand that not every one of them has the same quilting experience. For those who are so particular about the quilting, maybe they shouldn't take it to a quilting bee with ladies of different abilities. It's especially sad since you asked her. My other thought that one doesn't practice for an hour and become a quilter of tiny stitches -- at least not me!
I'm sorry your feelings got hurt. I would have felt the same. My grandmother quilted by hand but she absolutely was not into perfection. She taught me a lot about shrugging my shoulders and going with the flow. One of my daily sayings is that God doesn't expect me to be perfect. That is why He saved us. Have a great day!!
Oh Missy I am sorry she was that way. I would always cherish anything that someone else did for me. Lord knows that my piecing is in no way perfect. ;/
I love imperfect hand quilting because it shows the heart and hands of the stitcher. If someone takes the time to hand stitch and is giving it for the benefit of someone else, it is worthy. I have some quilts from my mother in law that she did in hand x type stitching on polyester (70s), that I treasure for the love and intent they were made with. Once, I made dresses for Dress a Girl around the world, found a local chapter, and was rejected because the dresses were not their "style" that they wanted to send. Sent them with our church team to Swaziland where the girls loved them. So, brush it off, keep praying for a group like I am (to do comfort quilts). It wasn't a rejection of you, it was her issue. You learned how better to treat people.
Yes, you should always be kind when you try to mentor someone. We have hand quilters at church and I have heard, although I cannot confirm, that they are also extremely particular and you better not try to join if your stitches are not perfect. I always thought the quilting bees were for what you say, have company while making quilts and developing your skills.
Remember those that set limitations for others often limit themselves and lose out on developing and growing!
So sorry that happened Missy :(
Hope it doesn't discourage you from looking for a loving group of hand stitchers. It's all about the process for me, so a group where perfection is expected would stress me out!
ENJOY some slow stitching today... thanks for linking up!
I am so sorry you had that experience. It was insensitive. I hope you will be able to find a group that will be fun and encouraging. Hopefully the lady was just having a bad day. Hand quilting does seem to take a long time to master. But the more you do the better you will get. When I first started a teacher told me to "warm up" for about 15 minutes on a preprinted panel (because the stitches do not show as much) and then move on to the latest project .It did seem to help me a little. If we lived closer together I would enjoy stitching with you.
Your post really warms my almost 75 year old heart. This is the way I learned to quilt...in the basement of an old country church on a frame hanging from the ceiling and moving back and forth. The little ladies were seated around it and they taught me to do the little stitches. Now, you can understand why I have had such a difficult time adjusting to all the modern inventions...i.e. long arm, precut pieces, color coordinated packs of fabrics, rotary cutters...the list goes on. I am slowly learning to quilt on the machine but I still prefer the hoops and my lap with the hand stitches. I can just hear that little lady now. That is the way they were. She was not being ugly...it is just their way...so many of them. I was lucky that there was one in my original group that was more hands on and encouraging. I know how wonderful it is to have a group to quilt with. I miss that terribly especially now that I am getting so much older. Happy Quilting. genie
My sister's advice for something like this situation is 'shrug it off and move on'. But sometimes it takes a little while to shrug :)
I belong to several groups and there seems to be one bad apple in each one. Don't let that one person discourage you. I am sure you will find someone who is most willing and gracious about teaching you to hand quilt! Hang in there, I find for the most part quilters are very nice and giving of their time!
A lot of time went into that pretty embroidery and I'll bet that at some point the maker of the quilt was a beginner too :) she most likely forgot that along the line...
So sorry you had this experience. I agree with the others and hope you can shrug it off as her having a bad day. We all do have to start somewhere and everyone was a beginner at one point.
Its lovely and the embroidery is wonderful. Hugs!
I read a devotional at my beginning quilting class a few weeks ago. It was about two different quilting grandmothers, and, how one almost discouraged her granddaughter from stitching with her perfectionism, while the other grandmother pointed out the improvements each time. If not for the second grandmother, she would have given up on stitching. Remember all the good comments on your stitching, and how you keep trying to improve, and let her comments roll off your back. You have come a long way in a short time. You can come hand quilt with me any time.
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